[Journal] Tweaking the meds again

Over the last few months, I’ve noticed that my ‘nerve pain’ has been coming back.

Nerve pain is the term I use to describe the sporadic, usually-short-lived bursts of pain from parts of my body. Sometimes it feels like a knife in the knee, another time it’ll be a back spazm, the time after that, it can be a very short cluster headache. It’s always random and entirely unpredictable and is very intense. Usually enough for me to cry out/swear/punch a table/use your imagination here, and stop me in my tracks. It can hit anywhere from between my fingers through to *ahem* very specific bits of my ladyparts (which is NOT a fun experience, I can tell you). Anywhere where there might be a cluster of nerves. It can happen once a day, or anywhere up to 50+ times a day. It depends on how much of an arsehole my body is feeling like at the time.

Now, I was initially put on Lyrica in the hope that it might help my overall pain levels, but it only succeeded in making me really groggy. We upped the dose to the 150s I’m on presently and found, quite conveniently, that it actually stopped my nerve pain. Not altogether, but to such a degree that it took my daily average of “[Inert expletive here]!” down from about 30-odd times a day to about 1 or 2. It was amazing. I still felt like a zombie, but I could go about my business without looking like I was about to have a stroke in the middle of the supermarket because my knee just felt like I had been stabbed by an angry dwarf on cocaine.

The problem is that my body, never being content to take the easy street, has decided we’ve built up a tolerance to the Lyrica. So we’re still Queen Derp, but the nerve pain came back and announced itself most spectacularly with a punch-in-the-head cluster headache the other day that had me hugging my own skull. I had noticed an increase in the amount of nerve pain up to then, but had chalked that down to stress and other things.

Now, I had called my specialist a month or two beforehand to let him know that we couldn’t increase my dose to the 150 because I was already on it, but had heard nothing back. This morning I left a message and got a call back after I had already discussed my issues with my GP.

– On an aside, awesome news. Turns out my sinus infection was a twofer. One bacterial, one viral. Yeehaw –

Long story short, I’m right in my assumptions, my GP no longer thinks I’m an idiot and I get to pay less for medication. Downside is that we’ve got two options, both okay’d by my specialist. Option A is to double the dose of Lyrica I’m on and see if it fixes the issue, but then I’m on twice as much as I was before with every chance of me just having the same problem. Or B, we can wean me off it, stay off it for a month to clear my system and then start it up again and see if it works. I feel like this is the human equivalent of “have you tried turning it on and off again”.

I’ve opted for the second one because, frankly, knowing how my body reacted to going on Lyrica, I’m going to be completely braindead if we double the dose. I’m barely functioning now, but at least I’m not putting-my-hand-in-the-sandwich-toaster kind of stupid. Yet. The issue with coming off the Lyrica, though, is the same as going up a dose. It’s not going to be fun. From what I know, it won’t be quite as bad as coming off the Duloxetine, but it’s still not overly fun. And this isn’t the nice, gentle let-down either. It’s a week of every other day and then cold turkey because we need it out of my system asap.

So, tonight is the first night of no Lyrica. I won’t fully feel the effects until about tomorrow afternoon, knowing my body (or maybe sooner, who knows) but I’m probably going to feel like I’m hungover without the ‘fun’ of actually getting there. After this, both my specialist and my GP have said that this is pretty much it. There’s nothing else we can really do without any more research or findings. It’s the end of my proverbial golden road of treatment until someone extends the footpath. Ultimately, if all the Lyrica is doing is stopping those shooting pains (and I’m getting a head full of wet sand in compensation), I think I’d be happier being off it entirely. I’m going to keep logs of how I’m going in regards to pain, just to see if it’s actually worth being on yet another tablet for much ado about nothing in the long run.

Anyway, I’m exhausted, so I’m heading in for the night. As a treat to those who have made it this far, if there’s any animal, mineral or vegitable in particular you want to see immortalised in a comic or just on it’s own, leave a comment and I’ll get back to you at the sound of the beeeeeeep~

[Journal] Procrastination

Firstly, wow. I am majorly behind in my blogging. The last month and a bit whizzed by me in a bit of a blur. I worked until 2am every night up until my biggest market event and put everything on hold – social life, games, comics – then I worked over the weekend of my big event with the help form some very special people, and then I hit the drop after the event where my body reminded me exactly how hard I had been punishing it. Of course, this is the end of week 2 after the event and I’m only just getting some time to myself. The entire week after was supposed to be my “off week” and just happened to be filled with every appointment known to mankind. By the time I finally had a spare moment to jot down a blog entry or comic, my body turned around and laughed at me.

I’ve more or less spent the last two weeks dealing with the nuclear fallout of pushing myself harder than I should have had to, but without my normal 12 month runup to the event, I had to do 365 days of work in just under 2 months. I was NOT happy. To further my frustration, almost every bit of equipment I needed died in the arse. My PC? $1000 fix. It’s a long story, trust me, but I couldn’t really avoid the cost. The embroidery machine more expensive than my car? Eating projects to the point where it couldn’t be used. My body? Well, we had the food poisoning incident. Hell, even the event itself managed to try and do us over by throwing emergency storm warnings at us and flooding the stall. Once we got back, my car tried to shit out it’s own transmission, I ended up with (thankfully!) a mild case of tonsillitis because some chucklefuck decided to share a drink with the chronically sick girl without using their fucking brain, several hundred dollars in medical bills and general chaos.

The event turnover wasn’t as awesome as I had hoped, but I made some wonderful friends over the weekend, got to spend time with both my big and my little sister, the amazing gentleman that I call my (adoptive) father and that side of my family. When we got home, I crashed pretty hard and it’s been a very hard slog to get the most mundane things done. Today is a very good example of that. I’ve been telling Manthing that I’ll wash the dishes for two days now, but the thought of standing, using the bathroom and moving in general is filthy exhausting, and even if I had some kind of energy, the pain I’m presently in rules most stuff out, too. I’d be in bed rather than writing this blog if there was some hope of me actually getting to sleep.

I’ve spent the better part of the last 3 days watching this amazing guy (if you haven’t seen Vet Ranch, go do it now) and just trying to survive. On the plus side, I found the most recent comic I uploaded in a pile of papers on my desk and also noticed that According to Abigail has officially cracked the 40 comic mark. That’s pretty damned impressive if you ask me. Getting out of bed on a bad day can be hard enough, but this is actually a really cool achievement and one that I’m keen on continuing. My honest to goodness dream is that I’d LOVE to see my comics in print some day. An actual, physical book to hold.

For now, though, I’m content to keep on doing what I’ve been doing. I’ve also noticed that there’s quite a few more followers since my last blog, so here’s a hello and welcome to those of you joining us for the first time. May I say “I’m sorry” in advance for the shameless swearing, creative descriptors and general shenanigans you will find here. For my regulars that I can’t seem to shake, you all get gold stars for putting up with me this long. You guys must be suckers for punishment or something ❤

I'm pretty much exhausted at this point so I'm going to sign off. At the very least, I hope that this post lets you all know that I'm still alive and kicking and hope to bring you more comics in the coming weeks.

Keep being awesome ❤